August 18, 2005
Big Hollywood Movie Disappoints Critics, Makes $$$
(HOLLYWOOD) – A huge Hollywood action movie starring some big names and a few unknowns is raking in millions at the box office, although critics are disappointed.
“It’s just another forumlaic plot carried along by big explosions and big-budget special effects. It’s the kind of drivel you expect from Hollywood,” said a critic.
While the blockbuster set records for opening day reciepts, the studios were bemoaning the fact that the movie wasn’t turning the profits it expected and pleaded with Americans to get off their couches and retun to the theaters.
“We may have to stop making insanely expensive movies with virtually no artistic value but lots of hot women and explosions. If Americans don’t want to see hot women and explosions then thy’re doing the right thing by staying away from theaters. But all I can say is when you start wondering where all the hot women and explosions went, don’t come crying to us,” said a Hollywood studio executive.
Meanwhile audiences lined up and raved about the new flick, saying it’s one of the best hits of the summer.
“I don’t know if it’s good,” said an average movie-goer, “but you have to see it on the big screen. The special effects and hot women were just awesome.”
Despite the dissapointment of critics and studio execs, the Director is already working on the sequel.